Oh, yes, yes. Happy Thursday everybody. Yes. So the sanctuary flights continue, and they're the only flights that are on time. Last night, Florida Governor DeSantis sent two planes full of illegal immigrants to the progressive paradise known as Martha's Vineyard. Which makes sense, it's a vineyard, and those grapes ain't going to pick themselves up. I mean, I assume there'll be plenty of work on a vineyard, but I wouldn't know, I'm not allowed there, at least since Barack's birthday party. You should have seen his face when I jumped out of the cake. The G-string was a little much, and I was wearing one, too.
But the coverage has been hysterical. As if sending migrants from a sweltering part of Texas to the most luxurious vacation spot in America, home to the likes of Obama, Larry David, John Kerry, is now somehow cruel and inhumane punishment. But maybe it is cruel, after all you know who also lives there? James Taylor. Yeah, I know. I wonder if he has a comment.
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It's an island, excellent. And since every liberal celebrity fancies themselves a sanctuary city supporter, why shouldn't they mingle with the migrants they championed from afar, right?
FLORIDA GOV. DESANTIS SAYS FUNDS ARE IN PLACE TO BUS ILLEGAL MIGRANTS OUT OF HIS STATE
I mean, it's pretty rich how the media refused to cover the border crisis as long as it affected Texas or Florida. You know, because who cares? But now that the responsibility has been shared by force, they're deeply, deeply concerned, as are the Dems. Listen to these ----.
THE VIEW: I think this is just political theater.
MSNBC: Treating people like political pawns.
DEMOCRATIC CONGRESSMAN: Using migrants as pawns.
TIM KAINE: What's he looking for? He's looking for a headline.
CHARLIE CRIST: Another disgusting and vile move.
WHOOPI GOLDBERG: These are people you're playing with. These are real, live people with children and older people. And, you know, we can work it out, but if you're going to be a bonehead, who wants to play with you?
Who wants to play with you, and they call this inhumane, after ignoring the migrant drownings, multiple deaths in smugglers' trucks, overdoses from fentanyl coming through our border. So save your outrage, you gargantuan gas bags. You are just worried about losing the cheap labor that trims your hedges and your bikini area. I was speaking about Charlie Crist. Very clean down there. Yes, I am referring to all of those people in D.C. and New York who were beating their chests when Trump was president, saying they were so proud to be sanctuary jurisdictions. Right, Ron?
RON DESANTIS: All those people in DC and New York were beating their chests when Trump was president, saying they were so proud to be sanctuary jurisdictions, saying how bad it was to have a secure border. The minute even a small fraction of what those border towns deal with every day is brought to their front door. They all of a sudden go berserk, and they're so upset that this is happening. And it just shows you, you know, their virtue signaling is a fraud.
TEXAS CLAIMS A WIN AFTER GOV. ABBOTT PLEDGED TO BUS ILLEGALS TO WASHINGTON
It is brother. And I am pretty sure the message is clear, we are not a sanctuary state.
RON DESANTIS: Our message is, you know, we're not a sanctuary state, we don't have benefits or any of that. There are some sanctuary jurisdictions and that would be better. Now, what would be the best is for Biden to do his damn job and secure the border.
You're only allowed to applaud me. He can't hear you. That was tape. True, we wouldn't have to do all this if the government actually enforced the laws. After all, aren't they supporting policies that are frankly indefensible?
RON DESANTIS: They are supporting policies that are just frankly indefensible. It is not defensible for a superpower to not have any control over the territory of its country, over the borders of its country.
Well, the logic is simple. States that have incentivized illegal immigration by supporting lax border policies should be made to feel the impact of their own actions. And given that they paraded themselves as sanctuary states, they should be overjoyed that they'll be able to better care for the migrants than these evil border states.
It's perfect, you mock border states for complaining about the problem. Then why don't you try being a border state for a while? Border states deal with millions of illegal immigrants. Meanwhile, sanctuary states buckle with hundreds. But I'm sure the administration is on top of that.
REPORTER: Does the White House stand by those comments that the border is secure?
KARINE JEAN-PIERRE: What we stand by is that we are doing everything that we can to make sure that we follow the process that's been put forth. That's why we have historic funding to do just that, to make sure that, you know, to make sure that, to make sure that, the folks that we encounter at the border be removed or expelled.
Wow. That sounded like me when Dana caught me trying on her leggings. It's not like, hey, don't leave your bedroom window open, but maybe Karine needs the Kamala treatment. Some bongos, perhaps.
KARINE JEAN-PIERRE WITH BONGOS: What we stand by is that we are doing everything that we can to make sure that we follow the process that's been put forth. That's why we have historic funding to do just that, to make sure that, you know, to make sure that, to make sure that, the folks that we encounter at the border be removed or expelled.
TEXAS GOV. GREG ABBOTT DIRECTS USE OF BUSES TO DROP OFF MIGRANTS AT STEPS OF CAPITOL IN DC
Bongos. But basically, oh, it's okay. Save it for later. Give some of that to Kimmel. But basically, a border state is making a sanctuary state walk the walk, which poses a problem for critics of Florida and Texas. How can you be upset that Florida or Texas is shipping migrants to your town if you feel that those red states are inhospitable and yours isn't. Isn't transporting migrants to your cities like Chicago or Philly a true act of charity or bipartisanship?
Unless, of course, you think it's cruel to send them there. And you might be right. Migrants leave Venezuela for the U.S. only to realize liberal run cities might be worse. They find that Philly is just Caracas with cheesesteaks and Chicago is just Tijuana with more gunfire. And at least in Tijuana, they fire the guns in the air, not into your bedroom.
So what of Martha's Vineyard? Even though it's a tiny island, the homes are huge. Small families like the Obamas own a multimillion dollar home on the island with presumably many spare rooms. He could temporarily house some migrants, you know. But please, no kids in cages this time. And think about all the time saved, the cheap labor will be right there on location, ready to set up the tables for Obama's next superspreading birthday party. But the best part, what it's done to the phony politicians.
The munchkin mayor from Chicago called Texas sending migrants to her city both racist and un-Christian. This was right before she herself sent migrants from her city to a suburb. But doesn't this make her even more un-Christian since she bragged about being a sanctuary city? I mean, you can't get more un-Christian than saying there's room at the inn and when folks arrive after a long journey, telling them there is no room at the inn, and you can bet some of those folks are named Jesus.
